


The Return of the Midgard Serpent

by Dormammu



Category: Avengers Assemble (Cartoon), The Avengers (Marvel) - All Media Types
Genre: Action & Romance, Action/Adventure, Adventure, First Kiss, Kidnapping, M/M, Miðgarðr | Midgard, Post-Season/Series 03, Protective Steve Rogers, Romance, Steve's Planet Hulk gladiator outfit, nokia 3310 - Freeform, spoiler characters - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-05-16
Updated: 2017-05-16
Packaged: 2018-11-01 15:30:30
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,668
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10924728
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Dormammu/pseuds/Dormammu
Summary: Avengers fight an old enemy, the Midgard Serpent. But not all is as it seems. When the Serpent devours one of their own, Steve has to step up and lead the team, figure out what really happened, and in addition, come to terms with his own feelings and take a chance, timing be damned.





	The Return of the Midgard Serpent

It was one of those rare calm Saturday afternoons in the Avengers Tower. There were no dangers to speak of, and all their training practices were finished earlier in the day.

Thor, Hulk and Hawkeye were assembled around the game console, playing Veggies of Valor 2, Sam was reading one of his hefty books on building construction, Natasha was going over her villain list, rearranging it and occasionally mumbling to herself.

Somewhat apart from their teammates, Steve and Tony were sitting by the bar, deep in conversation. Well, Tony was the one deeply conversing, while Steve was the one deeply listening to him, with what he hoped was not a too-hopelessly-smitten look on his face.

Over the past few months, ever since they'd gotten Tony back from the pocket dimension Dr. Strange had to trap him in when Ultron hijacked his body and armor, Steve and Tony had grown closer. They talked more, hung out, even started a couple of joint projects.

Fear of losing Tony again factored in greatly, among other things, for Steve. On Tony's part, Steve supposed it was humoring "the fretful old man". Which was why Steve hadn't yet broached the subject of "other things", or, as some less than delicate Avengers (Natasha for one) would've said, the subject of the gigantic torch he was carrying for Tony.

"I'm telling you, Cap, you missed a lot," Tony was saying presently, "but if you had to witness one decade, the late nineties and early noughties were it. That was when all the tech started getting good. For example, the cellphones existed prior to that, but it was in the late nineties when they started becoming really good and affordable for everyone, not just the Patrick Bateman types. Texting? Got big. Goodbye payphones! And the cellphones only got smaller and cooler, and smarter. It was the tech boom that ushered in the new century! You know, like the steam engine in your time?" He smiled wickedly at Steve.

Steve took that opportunity to playfully bump him on the shoulder. But really, he couldn't help it, he found Tony sweet and painfully attractive even when he teased him about being old.

"There was this one phone, Nokia 3310..." Tony continued, gesticulating with his thumbs as if he were holding a small phone in his hands. "It could withstand anything. Everyone had it, it became sort of a cultural icon. The Snake!" he suddenly exclaimed. "You missed The Snake, Cap! I held the highest of the high scores, maybe even the world record!" For a second, Tony seemed lost in a memory. "Thing about the Snake was," he straightened somewhat as he started explaining, "you had to focus and fill the screen with the ever growing snake. It ate these... things and grew larger, and when it got really big, and you..." Tony stopped gesticulating and sighed. "You had to be there."

"I guess..." Steve said, he hadn't really listened to half of what Tony was saying. As was usually the case, when Tony got into explaining something, Steve got lost in watching his face light up, his dark eyes get all bright, his hands animated.

"Or, maybe now that it's out again, I could show you? Recapture some of that feeling?" Tony winked at him.

"Yeah," Steve said, smiling. He had no clue what Tony was talking about, but usually he got even more cheerful and animated when showing him new things and that was always a plus.

"Maybe you could show me in a few minutes?" Steve said, not taking his eyes off Tony. "Your room, maybe? You go first and I'll join you."

Tony put one hand on Steve's shoulder and squeezed lightly, his face got even more bright. "You want me to show you? Really? Deal!" He got off his stool. "Lemme just make some arrangements, it'll take only a second. Well, five seconds. I need to get a few things delivered."

He was by Steve's side when he stopped and leaned in, saying, "Maybe you should do some finger exercises while you wait, we could stay in my room until after the nightfall." With a parting wink, Tony was gone.

Steve looked around, everyone still seemed engrossed in their own business. Sneaking off would be a piece of cake, he concluded.

He thought about Tony's final comment, about exercising his fingers, and warm tingles ran through his body as he let himself imagine telling Tony about his feelings and then maybe exercising some other body parts with him. He constantly had fantasies like that, but the reality was, he didn't think the time was right to act on his feelings. Because even if Tony felt the same way, he'd probably think Steve was into him for misplaced fear of losing him again. He knew Tony thought such things because Tony indicated it on several occasions by saying things like "Cap, you don't have to be such a worrywart, I'll be fine on my own." when all Steve had wanted was to stay with Tony in the empty Avengers Tower, watching a movie or playing cards, or just getting him to talk about future technologies.

He had felt that way about Tony for a long time. Even before Ultron. But for all his tactical prowess, timing, Tony and feelings were three things he just couldn't figure out when put together. For now, until he felt in his gut that his declaration of romantic feelings wouldn't be misunderstood, friendship had to suffice.

Five minutes passed to a second, and Steve decided that was enough time. Then, embarrassed by his own eagerness, he decided to wait ten more seconds, eyeing the large clock behind the bar like Hulk eyed the last pizza.

And on the ninth second, just as the sweep hand was about to pass to the tenth, the Avengers alarm blared.

  
F.R.I.D.A.Y. informed them about a still uncategorized attack happening in a village of Järvikylä in Finland, with reports of an unseen force destroying everything in its way. No human casualties, yet. The small village was being quickly evacuated, but there was a great probability of the attack spreading to the nearby populated areas.

  
They fired up the Avenjet, and punching in the coordinates, Steve silently cursed both his and that village's luck.

"Dammit, and our fun package was on its way," a fully suited-up Iron Man mumbled as he passed Steve on the way to his seat in the Avenjet.

Steve decided the best way to use the feeling of disappointment was to focus the punch of it on finishing the mission as soon as possible.

  
When they arrived in the village, there was very little of the village left. Whatever had attacked it, left only rubble in its wake. Rubble and, Steve noticed, a distinctive wide, deeply cut sort of a path spreading as far as the eye could see. A path that got wider as it went on.

"Odin's beard!" said Thor. "This cannot be!"

Steve had recognized the distinct footprint as well.

"I'm guessing -" Tony's voice in Steve's comm was breathless, "- another visit from our old friend, The Midgard Serpent?"

"I'm no expert but sure looks like it," said Hawkeye, who climbed a small hill and was scoping the scene.

"That stupid snake interrupted our game?!" Hulk yelled, "I was winning!"

"No you weren't," said both Thor and Hawkeye simultaneously.

"Guys, head in the game! We need to determine where it went and stop it destroying more villages," said Black Widow, approaching Hawkeye's hill.

"I'm trying to pinpoint its location," said Sam. "I'm using the data we collected last time, the distinctive signatures."

"Everyone, stay focused," Tony said. "The Midgard Serpent is invisible if it wants to be and can burrow into the earth, hide, and strike at will."

"The signature is muddled, but it seems to be present only here, in the village," Sam said.

They all knew what that meant. The Serpent could be biding its time under their feet.

"I shall fight it myself," said Thor. "This destiny I have escaped too many times, and now the cost could be more innocent lives!"

"Stay put, Thor!" said Tony. "We'll all fight it if it comes to that. We defeated it once, we'll do it again. What you need to do is prepare to banish the Serpent to the Asgardian underworld, where it belongs."

Thor nodded once. The Midgard Serpent was a sore subject for him.

"Hear that?" Hawkeye said suddenly.

Steve did hear it, a rumbling sound, like rocks cracking. Then he felt it, the earth was shaking, at first just a little, then it increased, until he felt like he was standing on a giant blender.

"Avengers, Assemble!" a voice yelled. It was Steve's own voice. He looked to where Thor was standing, he was already summoning lightning with Mjolnir to power the portal.

The gigantic serpent appeared, just behind Tony, who took to air as quick as a bullet. He stopped above Thor and the Serpent quickly followed his trajectory on the ground, eyeing Thor all the while.

"Everyone, surround it, don't let it escape!" Tony yelled. "Thor, you know what to do! Send it back to Hel!" And on what Steve hoped was a private channel, Tony said to him: "Hey Cap, a monster fight, huh? Bet you wish you were wearing something more comfortable?"

Steve knew what he was referring to. "No, I'm good, Iron Man," he said in a barely contained voice. Trust Tony to make him almost laugh in the middle of a battle.

Facing Tony and Thor, the snake ceased all motion. It looked at Thor with its emerald eyes, as if entranced by his presence, poised to strike at any moment. Thor, as always, assumed a fearless stance, ready to, if all else failed, become the Serpent's next meal - its final meal if the old Asgardian legends were to be trusted.

"Jörmungandr!" boomed Thor at the still rigid, hungry looking Serpent. The portal opened. "I banish thee-"

Without any warning, the snake lunged in Thor's direction in a high arch, seemingly aiming to swallow him on descent and then burrow into the ground.

"Thor, look out!" Steve yelled. "Hulk, push it into the portal!". Hulk needed no further instructions, in one jump he was at the Serpent's tail. However, he was not quick enough, and he, as all of them, mistakenly thought the Serpent's objective was Thor. It wasn't.

"Thor, get back!" were the last words Tony uttered before the Serpent swallowed him in one swift gulp, burrowed into the earth, and disappeared without a trace.

  
Steve's stomach dropped.

"Tony!" he screamed out. He ran as fast as he could to the spot where the Serpent disappeared with Tony. Nothing was there, even the dust had already, unnaturally, settled.

Tony was gone? Killed by the Serpent? His Tony... dead?

He couldn't breathe. The ground had stopped shaking yet he fell to his knees, unable to stand on his own feet.

Thor, who had been the closest to the place where the Serpent disappeared, knelt by Steve's side. "Captain, are you alright?"

"Iron Man..." Steve said softly.

"The signature disappeared!" Sam said in a terrified voice. "I can't reach Tony's comm. They're... he's gone!"

"What the hell happened? Why... Did the serpent go for Shellhead?" asked Hawkeye no one in particular.

Steve registered Clint's question through a haze in his head. He got up. "Hawkeye has a point. Why did the snake attack Tony?" He aimed the question, and his pointing finger at Thor, who flinched a little. "Sorry, Thor, I didn't mean... I just want to..."

"It is fine, Captain, " Thor said, getting up as well. "I understand. I am afraid, however, that I cannot answer your question. But I know someone who can." Thor's face assumed that determined look.

"Thor, wait-"

"Heimdall, portal!" And in a familiar flash of rainbow light, he was gone.

Steve straightened up, they had no time to waste, they were going after the serpent. He had to pull himself together and lead the team. Tony, if he was really dead, had to be avenged. And if he was still alive... This thought gave him a new push. They needed to act quickly and he had to take charge.

"Right," he said, trying for his Captain Voice, as Tony called it. "Thor went to Asgard to look for some answers, and while he's gone, we need to head back to the Avengers Tower."

"I agree," Sam said, coming to stand by his side. "All the equipment we need to look for the Serpent on a larger, earth-wide scale is there."

"We've no time to lose." Steve said, nodding vehemently. _If he's alive_ was left unspoken.

"We'll find them," Hawkeye said, smiling encouragingly, but his smile didn't reach his eyes.

They got into the Avenjet once more and set the course for New York.

  
Back in the Tower, Sam disappeared into the lab immediately, and Hawkeye followed him as his self-appointed assistant. Other Avengers: Hulk, Widow and Steve himself, were quietly waiting for Thor to return in the living room.

Steve was repeating the events in Järvikylä in his mind, trying to understand what happened, why had the Serpent gone for Tony, could the reason have been something Tony had said or done, something other Avengers did or said? And why did he feel, deep down in his gut, like he was missing something? Where was Thor? He should've been back by now. Rinse and repeat of that process: going over every detail, feeling the same sickness whenever he remembered the Serpent enclosing Tony within its mouth - he knew about its poison, and only hoped Tony's suit could withstand it. If Tony was still alive. And where was Thor...?

At about tenth go-around, they heard the crack of thunder. In an instant, Thor himself appeared.

"I come bearing some grave news about our friend," Thor said by a way of greeting. The three of the Avengers all got up.

"What did you find out?" said Steve impatiently.

"I sought council from one of the most learned people in Asgard, my mother Frigga. She begged me to stay in Asgard and let you deal with the Serpent... Mothers," Thor shrugged. "But when I said that the Serpent went after my brother in arms, Tony Stark, and not me this time, she relented. She said that it is not unusual for the Serpent to feast upon other people. The foul worm is a monster after all. He feeds upon flesh, be it mortal or immortal. Most importantly, he feeds on Asgard's misfortune. Her opinion is that the attack on friend Tony had to be somehow related to Asgard."

"What do you mean related to Asgard?" Steve interrupted. He was impatient for a location, anything, so they could just go get Tony. "Tony only ever visited Asgard a couple of times."

"Don't tell us he's one of your lost siblings?" Hawkeye said ascending the stairs to the living room, Sam was right behind him.

"No! Preposterous!" Thor exclaimed. "I asked her what it meant, and if her old books of learning and legends could illuminate the matter. She said she'd never come across Tony's name in any of them. However, as Tony is a builder, and there are many legends connected to builders, especially builders of weapons, in the books, she was sure it had something to do with his occupation. Then, as we sat down for a tea, she remembered one particular legend of a man from Midgard who shall supply Odin with armaments heretofore unseen and he shall pay the price with his dignity."

"Wait," Hawkeye interrupted, looking at Thor askance. "Tony willingly makes weapons for your dad, and pays for them in his own dignity?"

"Aye," Thor said, nodding. "If the books are to be believed. And they seldom aren't."

"So we know why it attacked Tony, maybe," Steve said. "What about saving him? How do we find the Serpent, Thor?"

"Oh yes, mother gave me this to aid in our search." He reached inside his armor and produced a silver chain with a small pendant made of some sort of a pale green, polished stone. He dangled it for everyone to see. "It is a snakestone. I am not sure how it works, but Mother said we need to put it over our maps and it shall start glowing once we find a portal to the part of Hel the Serpent took our friend. It works for any other realm as well."

Steve took a step forward, put his hand on Thor's shoulder and asked: "Does that mean he's alive? We'll find him and he'll be alive?"

Thor sighed. "I am afraid I cannot answer that question. Few men and women of Asgard have returned from such a predicament, and our friend Tony has a disadvantage of being a mere mortal."

"But he was in his armor," Steve said. "Doesn't that count for anything?"

"I am sorry, Captain, this is not exactly my area of expertise, I do not know how much Iron Man's suit of armor can withstand. As you well know, The Serpent drips with poison that can melt human flesh, strip it clean from the bones... But I'm afraid that's not the worst piece of knowledge Mother related to me."

Thor sat down on a couch and motioned for everyone else to follow his example. They all sat down.

"The Serpent is not of this world, nor of Asgard," he started. A peculiar, monotone quality his voice assumed was nerve-wracking. "He is of Helheim, the realm of death. And beyond that, within Helheim, he carved out his own realm, Jörmunheim..." Thor took a deep breath. "'And from thence no living soul returns, for it awaits Jörmungandr's final feast that shall last until the Cycle begins anew.' That is to say, if... if the Serpent finishes digesting Iron Man, this is where he'll end up, and getting him back will become impossible. He could spend eternity waiting to be devoured by the beast." He hung his head.

Tony trapped in a hidden realm? Not again, Steve thought. This can't be happening again!

"Thor," Steve said urgently, "how much time do we have until he disappears into the Serpent's realm? Something, the legends, the lore, you must know something!"

Thor slowly raised his head. "Yes. There are legends." He looked at Steve sadly. "But everyone knows they are inventions of drunkards and tale-spins."

Steve got up, clenched his fists and said "Level with me, Thor. I need to know if there's any chance we can save him, that he's not gone! Please!"

"I guess, if there's any truth in even one of the lays, the one written by my good friend Fandral could be it. He is also a drunkard and a tale-spin, but one who sometimes sacrifices the meter and rhyme to accommodate the truth. Or so I have been told."

Steve continued looking at him pleadingly until finally, Thor beckoned everyone to sit back down and assumed a stance not unlike one of a grandfather about to regale his grandchildren with stories about the "old country". He commenced by cleaning his throat.

"You can start any time," said Widow, voicing everyone's thoughts.

"You Midgardians have no patience for the noble tradition of storytelling." Thor said, looking somewhat offended.

Hulk growled menacingly. "Tick, tock, Goldilocks!"

"Fine, fine," Thor sagged. "Well, the gist of it is this: Fandral's good friend, who went by the name of Mord, got eaten by the Serpent. Fandral wrote a lay about it, it was very popular at feasts. Still is, 'tis how I know the words by heart. According to Fandral, not one time did Mani - the moon - kiss the fair Asgard brow asleep, before Mord escaped the foul worm's innards. Mord was, by Fandral's account, taken as he was relieving himself in the bushes after the morning feast. But as I said, Fandral's lays are in great part inventions. You should hear some he wrote about me!"

"So that would give us what, 12 hours?" Steve asked, hope blossoming in his heart.

"Aye! The Asgardian day is more or less of the same duration as the Midgardian one. But friend Steven, none of it is certain truth. Iron Man could still..."

"Enough! You, Sam and Hawkeye will go to the lab. Use that pendant and find us a portal! Widow, search the channels for any sign of Tony's comm. Hulk... occupy your time somehow."

"What about you, Winghead?" Hulk asked worriedly.

"I need to go change," Steve answered without any further explanation and strode off to his room.

  
One thought took over Steve's entire mind: he had to save Tony. There was only one right way to do it - wearing the special outfit. The one Tony had made for him for fighting monsters.

The outfit in question was actually Steve's idea, or more precisely, Steve's dream. There had been a period of time, a month or so ago, when Steve had strange dreams of fighting monsters dressed as a gladiator, and it felt so real. He could recollect the dreams in detail, as if he were there. He met people he had never seen before, people and monsters. He fought the monsters wearing pretty much two bits of leather (Tony seemed to like that part of the story, said he found it funny), and using his shield and a large axe. He felt free, fast and agile. When Tony had heard his story - and he heard it at least five times, at his own request - supposedly to listen for any weird details - he asked Steve if he'd like him to try and make the gladiator outfit he wore in his dreams. Well, "asked" was putting it a little mildly, he pretty much begged.

"Only on one condition," Steve had said. Tony nodded eagerly. "I don't put it on until there are actual monsters to fight." At Tony's pleased smirking he amended it to: "The kind of monsters I saw in my dreams."

"That's so unfair!" Tony had said. "We don't even know if your dreams were prophetic or, I don't know, a consequence of watching horror movies with Hulk."

"That's beside the point," Steve had said. "You offered to make it yourself, I'm just saying, no way I'm gonna wear it for your and Daily Bugle's amusement."

Few days later, the outfit uncannily similar to the one in his dreams appeared on his bed, neatly folded, accompanied by a custom made axe that was a perfect replica of the one Steve had drawn for Tony, the one he used in his dreams. He lifted it, the weight was just right.

Atop the outfit was a small card that said:

"To my favorite fantasy gladiator, may all the beasts tremble before you and fall comically in slo-mo at your feet.

Your own blacksmith and tailor (and whatever else occurs to you), Tony Stark

P.S. I'm thinking about making one of these leather skirt-things for myself, I tried yours on and liked the airy feeling on my leg hairs."

After spending a few minutes imagining Tony in his new "skirt-thing", Steve stored the outfit inside his closet. He figured, even if he never got to use it, he'd always keep the note in his bedside table drawer, to him it was even more precious than the outfit and the ax combined.

The dreams stopped soon after, and were for a short while replaced by the dreams of Tony wearing a leather apron and offering to polish the handle of his axe. Until the whole episode was pretty much forgotten.

Not anymore, thought Steve, looking at his own reflection in the mirror. He was wearing the full outfit, the axe was in his left hand and the shield in his right.

"You know what?" Tony had said when Steve told him he had gotten the note and the goods and it was all safely stored in his closet. "I'm positive that the Universe won't let anything happen to me until I see you rock this outfit in a real monster fight. No universe is that cruel."

Steve had blushed furiously, and Tony laughed at him and then Steve laughed, and then Tony treated him to a pizza at their favorite place.

Steve looked at his own reflection once more and said confidently "No, Tony, no universe is that cruel." Then he blushed because that was a cocky thing to say and Tony would have teased him for sure had he heard it.

Tony... If only Steve'd been more brave and just asked for a chance before...

The final glance at the mirror showed him a man on the verge of tears.

  
When he reentered the living room, silence fell. Granted, only Widow was there, but she stopped fiddling with her radio gadgets and looked at him like he'd turned into a green alien.

"Any luck?" he asked her, pretending not to notice anything strange.

Her mildly intrigued look was quickly replaced by the regular Widow glare. "No luck yet. I'm trying all the channels and using all my best tricks. If there's anyone who can find Tony..."

"What about the lab crew?"

"Still in the lab, and Hulk's in the training room. Said he needed to smash some robot snakes." She quietly returned to her communication devices.

Steve rushed downstairs, to the lab. He wanted to be there when they found the portal.

At the lab entrance he almost got throttled by Hawkeye.

"Good, you're here -" Hawkeye started. He gave Steve a once-over, then, after slightly shaking his head, continued, "Sam thinks he's got it, Thor's pendant is glowing over an area in Washington. I mean it's not very bright or anything, but Thor says it could be it."

Steve hastened to the work station over which Thor and Sam were having a lively conversation. in front of them was a holographic map, over which Thor held his pendant.

"Hawkeye says you've found him! You've found Tony?"

Sam lifted his eyes from the map. "Wow," he said, looking at Steve.

"Captain! We have great news!" said Thor, who didn't seem to notice anything unusual about Steve's clothes. "We have found Iron Man using Falcon's wit and my mother's pendant!"

"What about me?" Hawkeye whined.

"Refreshments you brought us were most... refreshing!" Thor assured him.

"Can you show me this area where Hawkeye said you found the portal?" Steve asked impatiently, glancing at the map.

"It's around or in Redmond, WA, we're not sure yet. I'm calibrating my on-boards as we speak," Sam said quickly, tapping his helmet.

"Can that be done en route?" Steve asked. He saw no need for wasting any more precious time in the tower.

"Well... yeah. Sure!" Sam said, taking a few things from the work station. "It's almost ready anyway."

"You heard the Captain, no better time for a glorious battle than the present time!" Thor said, clapping Steve on the shoulder.

"Yeah," Hawkeye added, "what he said!"

They raced to the Avenjet. Hulk and Widow - who was taking her radio equipment with her, joined them on the way.

  
The closer they got to Redmond, the more Falcon's suit sensors and the pendant indicated that they were nearing the portal. This was encouraging.

"Captain," Thor said as they were approaching the location, "that's a mighty fine ax. Friend Tony made it, yes?"

"Yeah. I... asked him to make it for me," he replied sadly. He knew Thor was trying to cheer him up, but in that moment, he just wanted to think about Serpent-fighting strategies and getting Tony back alive.

"If I may offer some advice, strike quickly and put your entire weight into it."

"I know," Steve said. "I dreamed about using it, and well, Tony... He was always the one who made my dreams come true." Steve hung his head, breathed deeply and thought about saving Tony. Thor quietly went back to his seat.

  
In Redmond, they found what Tony would've called "a tiny pinhole in the fabric of space-time" as soon as they left the Avenjet.

"Sam, can you see it?" Steve asked.

"Yeah," Sam replied. He shot a burst of laser light at it to indicate the exact location. "There."

"Alright, Avengers, you know what to do. Pour it on!"

They all shot at, punched and hammered where Sam had directed. The hole, however, did not enlarge into a portal.

"Why isn't it working?" said Hawkeye.

"I do not know," Thor said. "Look!" He took out the pendant and brought it to the space-time anomaly. It glowed the brightest yet. This was the place.

"It's the same type of the anomaly," Sam said, confused. "Hitting it hard should work."

"We'll try again," Steve said. "Give it all you've got!" It had to work!

They all let loose, tried everything, combo moves, combo throws. Nothing worked.

"What sorcery could be preventing our entry!?" Thor said, out of breath.

Steve had a strange feeling of déjà vu, or, more accurately, another strange feeling of missing something important.

"Maybe if we tried crashing the avenjet into it?" Hawkeye offered, shrugging.

"Wait," said Steve. "Something is wrong here. It has been wrong form the very beginning. Thor, you may be right."

Thor gave him a puzzled look.

"About the sorcery, I mean."

More puzzled looks followed.

"I had a feeling from the very beginning that there was some kind of a foul play at hand. First, the Serpent attacks Tony when it clearly wanted Thor. Not only attacks Tony, but takes off with him to the Asgardian underworld. And now, the portal that should've been easy for us to open, won't open. Not to mention, before we got the call, Tony was talking about snakes, and on its own I'd take it as a coincidence, but put together with all the other clues..."

"What are you saying?" Hawkeye asked.

"You think someone used the Serpent as a weapon?" Natasha asked. "Against Tony?"

Steve nodded. "I think someone wanted us to think the Serpent randomly devoured Tony without ever suspecting them, and that same someone wanted Tony dead. Or, as good as dead."

"Who?" Hulk said angrily.

Steve was now pretty sure he knew the answer to that question. "Serpent, Asgardian legends and realms, magic?"

"Loki?" asked Hulk.

"Doom!" roared Thor.

"Right you are, buffoon!" said a familiar voice, appearing out of nowhere. A second later, Doctor Doom materialized in their midst.

All the Avengers aimed their weapons at him as one.

"Doom," Steve spoke menacingly, "I swear, if you don't open that portal..."

"It's too late. Stark is dead. This is the beginning of end for the Avengers! You parasites have thwarted my plans for far too long."

Steve had him by the cape in an instant. "If Tony's dead," he said coldly, "and you should hope he's not, then you better find a well hidden dimensional rat-hole to crawl into because I will not rest until you're behind the thickest bars on Earth. Now open. The portal."

"Fine," Doom said. "If it's what you want, you ridiculous fool, you can keep Stark company in the afterlife. After all, two permanently incapacitated Avengers leaders will suit my plans even better than just one."

Before Steve knew what hit him, a strange sensation of being sucked into a large vacuum cleaner overtook him.

The next moment he was in what he recognised as the Asgardian realm of Hel. A large, cavernous space with thin streams of lava travelling down the stone walls, similar to the one where they fought Doom back when he'd possessed the Destroyer. Only, this room didn't have a Helhorn, or any trolls. Steve looked around and saw the serpent - its body now decreased to a more manageable size - in one of the large alcoves, it was sleeping. Inside it, Steve thought, was Tony.

"Time for a wake up call," he muttered to himself. He had resolved to fight the Serpent for Tony's life, to death if necessary, as soon as he caught the first glimpse of its prone form.

He threw his shield at it once, then once more, that second hit went between its eyes, the Midgard Serpent moved, making the ground tremble. Then, opening its eyes and fastening them on Steve, it roared.

Steve went at it with the ax, quick attacks, even quicker retreats. The idea was to make it get up to its full height, then punch it hard in the stomach.

"Come on, monster!" He remembered some of Thor's taunts. "Beast!" He struck it with the ax. "Foul worm!" he yelled as he slammed the edge of his shield into its tail. The serpent roared loudly and aimed at him a look that promised a quick death. It left the alcove and followed Steve to the middle of the room.

Steve was about to forcefully run into the Serpent, attacking its belly with both his shield and ax, when he heard a static in his comm.

"Steve? That you yelling outside?" It was Tony's voice.

"Tony?" Steve said softly, while jumping out of the Serpent's way. Tony was alive!

"Can you... get me out of here?"

"I'm doing just that."

"Oh. Good. Hey, did you figure out it was Doom?"

"Yeah," Steve said in a strained voice, as he just barely ducked under Serpent's welcoming mouth. "He's the one who sent me here!" He punctuated "he" and "sent" with two forceful punches with the blunt part of his ax delivering them straight to the soft part of the Serpent's abdomen. He punched the Serpent a couple more times in the same area using his shield. "Not sure I like Doom's real estate advice."

The serpent started wobbling, hissing, its large body going through stronger and stronger convulsions.

"It's actually really warm in here," Tony said, laughter coloring his voice. "I might strike some kind of a holiday deal with the old -" before he could finish that sentence, the serpent forcefully expelled him from its body, then undignifiedly fell over.

"Tony!" Steve yelled and ran to him.

"On second thought," Tony said, sitting up, "I always liked the idea of owning a private island. Yech!" He was covered in slime.

"Well I wouldn't dismiss this place yet. We could be stuck here for some time." He offered Tony a hand.

"Wait!" Tony said, "I need to scan this slime." he did so with his gauntlet. His entire armor was pretty much intact - other than being covered in colorless goo - and Steve decided not to give Tony a hard time about over-reliance on tech for at least one month. "It's ok," he said, opening his visor, "just gut slime. Seems it only uses its poison when attacking topside." He took Steve's hand and with his help got up.

"Doom has - " Steve started.

"Oh my god!" Tony exclaimed, interrupting him. "You're wearing your monster dream outfit!"

Steve smiled shyly. "Yeah."

"And you just fought the Midgard Serpent in it! And you used the ax!" He pointed at the ax excitedly.

"Yeah." He wanted to tell him: "Because I'm in love with you and because I would do anything for you." He didn't, of course.

"You idiot," Tony said in a soft voice and shook his head.

Steve's heart sank.

"You could've gotten burns and the Serpent could've poisoned you! Or bit you!"

"Well, _you_ could've been absorbed by that same giant serpent and trapped inside a pocket realm! Again!"

They both just stood there looking at each other angrily for a few moments.

"You look good though," Tony offered in a soft voice with a hint of a smile on his lips. "The grime on your biceps suits you."

"And your armor didn't disappoint, as always."

"So, about Doom?"

"Tony," Steve said, a new resolve taking place in his mind. "I need to tell you something. Something important."

"Ok, shoot."

"Over the past couple of months I..." He hesitated.

"Yes?" Tony was looking at him curiously, his dark eyes reflecting the glow of lava. If Steve ruined everything, at least he'd get to remember Tony like this, gorgeous even after spending half a day inside a giant snake.

"I have feelings for you. Romantic feelings," he said, not quite looking at Tony anymore.

"Oh."

"Oh?"

"Gimme a second. I thought you were going to say you have a terminal prognosis. Let me get back to my normal state of mind."

Steve decided to keep his mouth shut regarding that last sentence.

"Now, correct me if I'm wrong, you said 'over the past couple of months'?"

"That's not... I mean it is but-"

"Later?"

"Sooner."

Tony looked away. He seemed angry again.

"I was going to say something but it was never the right-"

"The right time." Tony interrupted.

"Yeah."

"You complete and utter... I thought you didn't feel that way about me! You never said anything and ever since I got back from the pocket dimension, all you wanted to do was play cards or watch dumb movies."

"Yeah! To spend time with you!"

" _I_ liked you way before Ultron," Tony said.

"Yeah? Which time?" Steve asked, unable to suppress a small smirk.

"After our mission to Skull's submarine, that's when I thought about you that way for the first time." Tony said, crossing his arms in challenge.

"Well, do you remember that time I learned everything about undifferentiated micro-clusters?" Steve put his hands on his hips. "I was trying to impress this one futurist I knew."

Tony looked at him, mouth agape. "Steve," he said, approaching, "if you say you had a crush on Justin Hammer I'm unfriending you on all social media. Actually, I'm going to be inventing social media just so I can unfriend you!"

"Oh my god, Tony, it's you! I've been in love with you for months, possibly years! Look at me!" he spread his hands, "I'm wearing a leather skirt!"

"I think you need to shut up," Tony said in a breathy voice, grabbed him by the collar and pressed his lips to Steve's.

The kiss was hot and consuming, and it went on forever, or at least that's how it felt to Steve, like drowning in Tony. Like heaven.

 

"Cap," suddenly came a staticky voice in Steve's comm. It was Natasha. He didn't answer, he and Tony were still kissing and if Steve had anything to say about it, they weren't going to stop any time soon.

"Cap? You there?" This was Hawkeye.

"Cap, status?" Sam.

Then a flash of light illuminated the space and some voices could be heard, Avengers' voices.

"We've opened the portal! You need to-" Natasha.

"Ow, my eyes!" Hawkeye.

Steve and Tony slowly separated. Steve's face felt hot. Tony on the other hand looked kissed out and smug about it. He took Tony's hand and they went towards the portal, then through it, together.

  
Outside, they could see no sign of Doom, only the Avengers remained.

"Where's Doom?" Steve asked.

"He escaped after Hulk... _made him_ remove his enchantments from the portal," Hawkeye said. "Slimy bastard!"

"He used a hidden teleporter," Natasha bit out, looking like, given a chance, she would gut Doom without a second thought.

"Who's up for pizza?" Hulk said, "after smashing Doom I deserve... seven!" He was, as always, referring to whole pizzas, not slices.

"Aye, I could go for a medium boar!" Thor said. Usually "boar" meant "any kind of meat, a lot of it" or "a pizza-eating contest with Hulk".

"I'm up for anything that doesn't include these two -" Sam pointed to Steve and Tony, who were still holding hands, "- acting all smitten in public."

"How did you live through past... forever?" Hawkeye mumbled. Everyone pretended not to have heard him.

"So, a mountain of pizzas at the tower, my treat," Tony said, not taking his eyes off of Steve, who suspected they would not be taking much part in the feast. After all, they had a "past forever" to make up for.

 

 - The End -


End file.
